Monday, January 8, 2018

Top 4 Teen Horror Flicks With ACTUAL Substance and Meaning

I'll be honest here -- teen horror flicks are like the bottom feeders of a very big barrel of horror. They're not exactly deep with their main ideas. You're typically looking at a cheesy story about some dudes and gals getting into some trouble and then paying for it dearly. And while it worked in a very subtle way for the entire FRIDAY THE 13TH film series (memorable, iconic, and hinting just a tad on the whole teen sex and debauchery satire), not every film actually hit it out of the ballpark --

The 90s and Early 2000s Saw That Massive Influx of Cookie-Cutter Teen Horror Flicks Basically Making You Brain Dead


You can practically pick them out of the air -- URBAN LEGEND (literally just a knock-off of one iconic horror film, which we'll get to), anything FINAL DESTINATION (all the films were literally just basic blood-and-guts porn), and that stinky Jennifer Love Hewitt vehicle I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER (as well as the utterly retarded sequel), excuses to see her navel and other extremities.

Part of the problem was the fact that Mr. Wes Craven utterly killed it back in the day. The classic "teen" horror flick only worked when paired with a recognizable and colorful style of character.
Almost something that's brandable --
  • Freddy Krueger
  • Jason Voorhees
  • Ghostface
Without the brand, it's just cheap, cheesy, gratuitous scare smut. Probably because teens rarely are taken seriously unless there's some underlying theme under all of it. As in a social satire.

And That's All It Took to Develop a TRULY Good Teen Horror Flick, Which Is Why We Did Have Some Real Winners Out There


I'll be the first to say that the teen horror flick DESERVES some honorable mention in the genre. The concept's ripe for a lot of layers -- political, social, psychological. Heck, just about every teen in America is its own horror story when you think about it. But when it's so easy to tap into the cheap jump scare as a way to get your ghoulish giggles from that kind of crowd looking for a reason to throw popcorn around, it sadly does give the teen horror flick a bit of a bad rep.

Which is why I'm almost honored -- nay, PRIVILEGED -- to give you this special list of teen horror flicks that are not only actually scary to some degree, but definitely bring home a definitive message about society in some way:

THE CRAFT (1996)


At first glance, this beast of a sexy teen flick may look like your everyday witchcraft movie, but it's so much more if you peel the layers. Check out a deeper review of the film right here.


THE FACULTY (1998)


Definitely a teen horror flick. But with the obvious undertones. What are those, you ask? Read up on it right here.


IT FOLLOWS (2014)


And here we jump a bit closer to today for a visceral look into something so poignant and interesting.... Look, if you haven't seen this film, you haven't seen horror (specifically teen horror). Here's why.


SCREAM (1996)

Need I say more? This was the film that began the unfortunate copycat phase most genres end up going through (HUNGER GAMES led to DIVERGENT led to MAZE RUNNER led to "yadda yadda"). But here's why the iconic SCREAM still to this day holds up beyond even that of the brandable "Ghostface."


You Can Also Bet We'll See More of Those Films With Substance, Reminding Everyone That Even Teen Horror Can Roll With the Best


We just have to get out of that stupid mindset that teens out there want just some yucks or a reason to make out in the theater. Seriously, there are kids out there who love a good story! Damn it! Don't you think?

1 comment:

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